Your last Single Girl Summer
Dating is changing. Governments have started matchmaking and apps are testing for masculinity, but is any of it actually working?
Hey you,
This week, I’m trying something different. Instead of one big story, three small ones. Because that’s what dating is all about — collecting stories, some bigger than others, and dismissing the ones that are totally ridiculous.
Read on for the tale of a government running its own dating app; a review of the dating app that claims masculine energy is the key to finding love; and a field report from what it’s like to wear your heart on your sleeve, literally.
In all cases, try not to take it, or yourself, too seriously.
With love & other rubbish,
Candice
Cupid Is a Civil Servant
She goes by the username Turtle, and she fell in love fast. She met him in August, made it official in September, and was engaged by December. Love in quick succession with matchmaking credit due to… the government.
In Japan, bedroom behaviours aren’t creating enough babies so the municipal government has intervened by launching its own AI-powered dating platform. Since debuting two years ago, the matchmaking platform TOKYO Enmusubi has facilitated 265 marriages and helped 760 couples enter serious relationships. Sure, the application form requires legally proving that you’re single — perhaps my app store history of downloading and deleting dating apps on repeat will suffice — but with numbers like those, I’m happy to hand over my future to my local representative.
So, Andy Burnham, if you’re reading this, I’d like my love life added to your 100 day plan.
Yin, Yang, and Total Nonsense.
I’ve never concerned myself with the masculinity quotient of the men I date. But scroll through enough reddit forums and you’ll find plenty of women who have.
A new dating app called Pleezer has launched promising to evaluate your ‘energetic balance’ to create ‘perfect harmonies between polarities.’ Translation: take the 25-question quiz to identify your masculine and feminine ratio and get matched with complementary profiles. Honestly, this feels a bit icky to me. I open my own doors. I’m also grateful when someone opens one for me. I’m independent and courageous, caring and intuitive. I don’t need a quiz to tell me which half of that is the ‘real’ me. And I definitely don’t trust a dating app that talks about ‘energy in sync, love in flow.’
Single Girl Summer
I’ve found my new hero. Her name is Sophie and she carries a tote bag emblazoned with ‘Yes I’m single. Shoot your shot’ and a QR code linking to her Instagram. Single, straightforward and fashionable. My kind of woman.
It turns out, wearing your single status on your sleeve head is very on trend. So, here’s me throwing my hat into the ring. Introducing my first merch drop, the Single Girl Summer cap.
Single Girl Summer is embroidered on the front
I’m single is flirtily stated on the back
Your hopes of finally deleting the dating apps has never been higher.
I’ve worn it through airports, in supermarket queues, at the pub. It works. Grab yours on Etsy and enjoy 25% off with code LOVERUBBISH.
Here’s a round up of the best pick-up lines to use in the wild.
…and other rubbish
My kind of screw
Her kitty cat is wearing the cat’s cradle
This is for the foot fetish fans
He didn’t stand a chance
I want a man who sprays like this
She said, he said
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are.”
Will Ferrell
Thanks for reading my dating stories. Hit the heart if you enjoyed it 👇