My One Night Stand
👨🏻🤝👨🏽 17 Men 🧛 Vampires 🛟 Inflatable Boobs
Hey Boo,
One of my proudest achievements last year was a one night stand. It took a fair bit of wrangling to set up, but once it was underway, it was deeply satisfying.
I am referring, of course, to my Halloween costume.
Using cardboard, a lampshade, and an old sheet, I fashioned the punniest costume imaginable. Around my neck, I hung a QR code linking to a website with two options:
“One night stand” let punters quench their burning bedroom needs by purchasing a bedside table from Ikea.
“Morning coffee” led to an application form to date me.
It was a trick and treat crowd pleaser.
Sure, you might expect a single girl like me to go down the sexy route. After all, the gospel of Lindsay Lohan preaches that “Halloween is the one night a year when a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.”
I have been that girl.
In 2007, I was a sexy Neanderthal, in 2010 a sexy German beer maid, and in 2011, a sexy Baywatch Babe (inflatable boobs included!). But somewhere along the way something shifted. I hung up the pigtail wig and stockings and became my fullest costumed self. Since then: a headless bride, a giant eyeball, even a gruesome vending machine (hard to explain – just look at the photo!). Halloween is my Superbowl so naturally, it’s on my mind… and, it turns out, the minds of singles everywhere.
From couples costumes to singles dating events, the desire to throw on something flammable and sip a Moscow Ghoul is on the rise. According to Eventbrite, attendance at Halloween themed dating events is up 159%, with ice-breaker events (think speed dating meets pumpkin carving) up 124%. Singles, are taking a whole new approach to finding a boo!
‘Hallo-dating’ works (even if that phrasing doesn’t) because singles are craving play, not static profiles. We’re so exhausted by endless swiping and virtual ghosting, that we’d rather meet someone dressed up as a ghost! There’s a shared silliness to it, an instant connection in the effort. Even if I won’t give someone the time of day for lazily throwing on a suit, a pair of sunglasses and claiming they’re dressed as secret service, another singleton will!
So this year, I’m practicing what I preach. The dating event ticket has been secured. The costume is in development. The hope of finding my Superman (or Batman or Spiderman) across a crowded bar is alive and well! For the equally inclined, there are plenty of event options still available in the UK and US.
As for the 17 men who applied to date me via last year’s QR code, only one made it to a date. Perfectly nice but not enough (last week’s issue tells you all you need to know about those kinds of guys). Funnily enough, in the year since, I’ve bumped into him at three other dating events. Some might call it fate, I call it the frightful reality of modern dating.
And yes, the application form is still live. If you fancy shooting your shot, I welcome your submission. Just know that I’m looking for someone who’s keen to turn one night stands into two bedside tables.
With love & other rubbish,
Candice
Singles Beware
Did you know that Halloween and dating share the same cast of scary characters? Here’s a cheat sheet of what to watch out for this spooky season (and beyond):
🧛 The Vampires
They drain your energy, and maybe even your bank account. Charming, seductive, and not at all available. They’ll suck the life out of your optimism, one voice note at a time.
🧟 The Zombies
The walking dead of dating. They live within the apps but there’s no spark behind their eyes. Technically alive, emotionally gone, totally defeated by the dating world.
🔮 The Fortune Tellers
They talk endlessly about what could happen – trips, futures, kids – but never actually follow through. All promises, no delivery. Also known as The Ghosters.
🧩 The Frankensteins
A monster of our own creation. Built from the best bits of our past infatuations but spoiler alert: they don’t exist. Let the fantasy go singleton, let it go.
…and other rubbish
You’re using what? Stop it. Stop it, right now
POV: the topic is men
Sir, that’s not going to be to comfortable for her
She’d never marry a f$cking loser
80% of men are disgusting
She said, he said
“In Germany, we do not have Halloween, which is a shame.”
Bill Kaulitz
Thanks for being my boo! If you like the stories, please share the love below. 👇
We loved your Halloween costumes, so groundbreaking! :) Also, we'll keep your dating monsters cheat sheet as a reference for future Halloween parties, hahaha.